Need a Hobby

A man needs a hobby.rugged junglemuscles. I recently purchased a bow tie
I guess I'm not well-rounded. I seldom take alike the kind used by
vacation (never, cometo think of it), and I don'tChippendale's male dancers, and I wear an old high
spend a whole lot of time in church,though I do notschool jockstrap from PE.
consider myself a pagan.I'm thinking of adding a strobe light to expand the
All I do is work to pay a bill, and I'm approximatelyact.
forty eighthours ahead of the rest of my bills.This is a hobby that's better than gin rummy.
Based on this, I recently came to the conclusion thatAnd, you're making people happy.
much of lifeis pointless.Another potential hobby involves the clever use of
I need a hobby.empty toiletpaper rolls, you know, those little
I need a hobby, something besides the simple desirecardboard cylinders once thetoilet paper is used up. I
for more sex.have long been fascinated by these.
That brings up an interesting point. Why is it thatHere's a neat potential hobby.
sex, is notconsidered a hobby? Maybe it's becauseTake two of the cylinders and unravel them. They
you don't use glue, orepoxy, like in making a modelwill still curl.
airplane.You can then put them on your wrists as bracelets.
Then again, maybe you do.These can beworn while making love to your wife or
In any event, I'm trying to find myself a hobby,significant other lover.
something at whichYou're portraying yourself as some kind of mythical
I can relax, and find personal enrichment.fantasy herolike Ben Hur, or Heracles.
Here are some possibilities that I have actually actedHe men used to wear bracelets back then. Really, no
upon, orhave been actively mulling over:joke! Back inthe real old old days when they used to,
Like most suburbanites, I live in fairly close proximity"slay" guys.
to otherhouses. The elderly lady in the house acrossOr, if making out in space is your thing, you can take
from me stares at myroom window a lot. We've alltwenty fiveof these cylinders, glue them side by
seen people who stare. Maybe she'sjust bored. Butside, and wear them as a kindof futuristic space belt
I've come to the conclusion...she's watching melike in Star Trek.
forsome reason.This gives your partner the chance to rip the belt off
There can only be one possibility.easily justbefore she throws you on the "beam me
She's watching me dress. And undress.up" machine and makes mad,passionate love to you.
After a week of this, I decided to give her herIf you're fat, you might need fifty of the toilet rolls.
money's worth.We can all be a little more creative these cold days
I now do two nightly shows, and one in thewhile waitingfor the warmer weather, and come up
morning.....at mywindow. My dressing and undressingwith a hobby that is not onlysatisfying, but gets us
shows.involved and aroused.
I go into a slow dance routine, and flex my huge,